Adult Swim Love Hina 2021!
by Akal-Saris
Summary: A parody of Sealab 2021's episode 13, 'Swimming in Oblivion.' It's a behind-the-scenes look at Love Hina! Enjoy!


Disclaimer:  I don't own Love Hina or Sealab, Ken Akamatsu and Cartoon Network do.

This is a parody/Crossover of Love Hina and Sealab 2021, a hilarious show on Cartoon Network.  I believe the specific episode I'm spoofing is 'Lost in Time', but I might have the names mixed up again…if you want to see the episode, check on Kazaa, I'm sharing it for dedicated readers ^_^

Love Hina: LOST IN SEALAB 

[Scene opens to show a huge Mecha-Tama threatening to destroy all of Hinata Town with Sara and Su on top of it.  Suddenly, the camera zooms into Keitaro pressing a button.  Explosions ring the Mecha, and both Su and Sara disappear in a ball of flames.  Next to Keitaro, Motoko gasps in horror.]

Motoko: Do you realize what you've done, Urashima?  Both Su and Sara are dead because of you!

Keitaro:  Two lives to save **two** **thousand**.  Those are odds I can **live with**!

Motoko: You **monster**!  I cannot believe that…you…would…

Keitaro: *waits patiently*……

Motoko: …I'm sorry, I can't do this.

The camera recedes away from the pair, revealing a huge backstage theatre complete with stagehands, a director, and props.  The director looks suspiciously like Ken Akamatsu, creator of Love Hina!

Ken:  Great job as always, Urashima!

Keitaro: Thanks man.

Ken: Do you want some water?

Keitaro: No

Ken: Hey Shinobu, get Mr. Urashima some water!  (Turns to Keitaro) You have to hydrate, man.  It's key.

Keitaro (Shrugs): All right.

Ken: I just **love** your body language, buddy.  (Turns to Motoko and sighs) Now, what is it this time, Aoyuma?

Motoko:  This…line…I can't go through with it.  Motoko would understand the sacrifice Keitaro is making, and even if she-

Ken: Aoyuma.  

Motoko:…yes?

Ken:  This is a TV show, okay?  And you're an actor.  You're paid to just do it by the script.  So just…do…the scene.

Motoko: Oh, fine.

Ken: Ok!  Lights…. camera…cue **fog** effects…action!

Keitaro: Ahem…. **two lives** to save two thousand!  **Those** are odds I can live with!

[Thousands of Tama-chans begin flying around the two actors, distracting Keitaro and scaring Motoko speechless]

Keitaro: Wha-???

Motoko: WAAAAAAA!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! DIE DIE DIE YOU INFERNAL BEASTS FROM HECK!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Ken: Cut!  Cut!  I said **fog** effects, not **frog** effects!  Gah…morons.  Okay, take it from the top!

Keitaro: Hrm...ah….two** lives** to **save** two thousand, Motoko!  **Those** are **odds** I can **live with**!

Motoko (in a completely deadpan voice): You monster I cannot believe you would do such a thing.

Ken: CUT!  Aoyuma, what the hell do you think you're doing?

Motoko (blinks innocently): What?  I said the lines, didn't I?  What?

Keitaro: I'll be in my trailer.

Ken: Urashima, wait!  Awww…(turns to Motoko).  Now look at what you've done!

Motoko: Speaking of which, how come he gets a trailer?  I don't have a trailer.

Ken: Look, Aoyuma-

Motoko:  I don't even have a chair.  But he has a trailer.

Ken: Aoyuma, please-

Motoko: He has a trailer, and I don't even have a fricken chair!  And Motoko would NOT say those lines!

Ken: Okay, look, let's get the author over, okay?

[Enter Shirai (Keitaro's short, pudgy friend)]

Shirai: Look Motoko, we're on a budget here, and running out of time.  Just do your part, okay?

Motoko: Why?  So we can end with another clichéd romantic scene with Keitaro and Naru about to kiss just before somebody interferes?

Shirai: IT'S NOT CLICHED!  IT'S **BISHOUJO**!  And this time, we're going to end with the two of them running away from everyone else-

Motoko: Like the OVA.

Shirai: -only Naru gets shot in the back, and there's a dramatic finish with Naru slowly falling as thousands of doves fly in slow motion in the background, and she whispers her last words in Keitaro's arms.

Motoko (stares in disbelief): That's Cowboy Bebop, you hack!

Shirai!  I am not a hack!

Motoko: No, you're just horrible at making believable storylines.

Shirai:  Actually, what isn't believable is you, considering I wrote Aoyuma as being impassive,

Motoko: Yeah, yeah…

Shirai: -and attractive…

Motoko: HEY!

Ken: OK!  Everybody take 10!  And somebody go get Urashima out of his trailer…

[Scene cuts to the other side of the theatre, where Kanako is being interviewed.]

Reporter: So, I understand you're part of the "Turn Keitaro and everyone else on the planet into Vampires" fan club?

Kanako: It's not a fan club.  It's a religion.

Reporter: Not according to Fanclub.Net!

[Kanako's eyes burn red]

Kanako: Oh, there will be a **DAY** of **RECKONING**!  And the rivers will run **RED** with **BLOOD** and there will be a **WAR** and a **SLASHING** of **HEADS**, and **YOU** will count yourself among the **DAMNED**!

Reporter (sweatdrops): So…what's it like working with vampires?

Kanako (shrugs): Eh…never met 1.

[Scene cuts to the dressing room, where Kitsune and Haitini are waiting]

Kitsune:  I can't believe this English dub!  My voice was supposed to be Sexy Southern Belle, but I sound like Sleazy Texan Slut!

[AN: My apologies to all Texan readers.  In fact, I like Kitsune's English dub…she's more tolerable than Motoko's, at least.]

Haitini: Hey, look at Su.  At least you don't sound like that Qwik-E Mart guy.

Kitsune: And just how unbelievable is my character, anyways?  I mean, has the writer never been with a girl?  Real women don't strip for zero apparent reason, and my character's obsession with money and booze is pathetic!

Haitini:  Yeah, and these action figurines are terrible!  I don't look this dumb in real life!

Kitsune: Yes, you do.  But if you think yours is bad, look at mine!

[Kitsune pulls out a figurine that looks like every perverted fanboy's dream come true]

Haitini: I like it.

Kitsune (Takes off her shirt): Wow, is it hot in here or what?

Haitini (Staring): So…you wanna get some sake?

Kitsune: Sure, if you're paying!

[Nearby is Chibi-Keitaro and Chibi-Promised-Girl]

Chibi-Kei: Wowow!  That Kitsune woman is one hawt MAMA!

Chibi-Girl: Yeah.  Too bad you're going to promise your love to an extremely violent and less attractive girl instead!

Chibi-Kei: *&^&$##!!!!!! DAMMIT!

[Scene cuts to Shinobu and Otohime dragging in a huge bundle of bandages for Keitaro, until Motoko blocks their way.  Motoko is reclining in a lounge chair and is wearing full samurai armor.]

Shinobu: Ano…Motoko-sempai, could you move out of the way please?

Motoko: This is my trailer.  Or if it would be if I had one.  And this would be my chair.  If I had a chair.  And I would put the chair in the trailer.  If I had one.

Ken: Okay, we finally tore Urashima from his Love Sim…Aoyuma, are you ready to cooperate?  And what's with that armor?

Motoko:  Well, since Motoko is descended from samurai, I've decided to adopt the traditional garb she would favor.

Ken: You have 5 seconds to get out of that armor and into a gi and hakama. Five…

Motoko: I'll just go change in my trailer.

Ken: Four…

Motoko: Oh wait!  I don't have a trailer!

Ken: Three…

Motoko: Then I'll change behind my chair!  

Ken: two…

Motoko:  The chair I don't have!

Ken: FINE!  You can have a chair!  Shirai, give the woman your chair.

Shirai (Looks hurt): H-hey!

Ken: Don't mess with me; I can rewrite your character whenever I want to.  (Looks over) Hey, fangirls?  I know this is taking a while, but I need you to maintain your obsessive enthusiasm for Motoko, okay?

Motoko's three fangirls: OH, MOTOKO-SEMPAIIII!!!!

Motoko: Rrrrghhh …

Ken: Okay…three…two…one…action!

[Scene opens with Sara dying a horrible death]

Motoko: Do you realize what you've done, Urashima?  Both Su and Sara are dead because of you!

Keitaro:  Two lives to save two thousand.  Those are odds I can **live with**!

Motoko: You **monster**!  First you kill off two lovable characters, and then you go home to your **trailer**!

Ken: CUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!  AOYUMA, YOU-

Keitaro: I'll handle this.

Ken: …oh, all right then, Mr. Urashima sir.

[Keitaro motions for Motoko to look at her chair.  It's new and shiny.]

Keitaro: You see that chair, Motoko?  Look at it.

Motoko: I am.

Keitaro: Now look at me!  Now back to the chair!

[When Motoko turns back to the chair, her sword is lying on it.]

Motoko: How…

Keitaro: Movie magic, Motoko.  And we're a part of that magic.  We're not just clichéd anime characters in an elaborate parody of two awesome TV shows…we're…**actors**, Motoko!

Motoko (Stares at Keitaro): Oh my God…I see it now…I understand…

Keitaro (Shifts uncomfortably): Good.

Motoko:  I love you, Keitaro.

Keitaro (Sweatdrops): Um…

Director: Okay!  One more time…and Motoko, at least **pretend** you're an actor!

Motoko: Hey!

[The entire world blurs, and is replaced by a dark room with two people sleeping in a bed.  One of them suddenly bolts up.]

Motoko: **AAAAHHHH**!!!!!!

Kanako: Unh?  What is it?

Motoko: Nightmare…it was horrible…

Kanako: The one with the thousands of perverted turtles?

Motoko: No…the other one…

Kanako:  The one where I sexually abuse you, try to run all the girls out of Hinatasou, and want to get laid with my brother?

Motoko(Groans): No…that's the OVA…

Kanako: The dream where you lap dance for Keitaro? 

Motoko: I don't dream about that!

Kanako: Oh, right, that's my fantasy.  So what were you dreaming about?

Motoko: I dreamt our entire lives were nothing but fictional characters created purely for the amusement of obsessed anime fans, and I didn't have a trailer, and you were part of some hideous vampiric fan club…

[Both characters slowly turn and look at the screen, and then turn back to each other]

Kanako: Actually, it's a religion.

Motoko (Blinks): What?

Kanako: Never mind…Motoko, there's something I have to tell you.

Motoko:  Hmm?

Kanako: I don't love you.

Motoko: …

Kanako: …

Motoko: This isn't a very happy ending.

Kanako: Most endings aren't.

Motoko: …

Kanako: …

Motoko: …you know, that Love Hina show has a happy ending.

Kanako: Only for Naru.


End file.
